The Big Heart One Kidney Team
It’s that time of year again, Sunday April 6th is the 2014 Kidney Walk benefiting the Arizona National Kidney Foundation.
Last year, I walked side by side 15 of my family and friends and raised over $1,500!
This year we plan to grow our team and raise even more money. I encourage you to help out this great cause and donate to http://kidneywalk.kintera.org/bigheartonekidney
Thanks!!
As I was reviewing my blog in hopes of writing a New Years post I realized I was missing the video from the interview I did for Channel 12 last year. Take a look at the Kidney Walk News Clip !
Apparently there are some people confused with my mission to promote living organ donation. The choice to become a living donor is not one to take lightly. I don’t think anyone that hasn’t gone through this experience can sit and judge the actions of one who has.
From the beginning of my “kidney journey” I had a lot of negative people trying to talk me out it. This was something I never understood considering my actions in no way, shape or form affected their lives. The only people affected was my recipient, her immediate family, my husband, my kids, my immediate family oh wait and… ME!
Recently it has come to my attention that people within my “circle” feel like I made the kidney story all about me! A part of me laughs when I hear this and another part can’t help but feel disgusted knowing that someone relatively close to me can have such a false perceptive on the subject.
To play devils advocate, I must point out that statistically people in kidney failure and receiving dialysis (like my recipient) live an average of 5 years. With that being said, my Godmother might not even be around right now if it weren’t for my kidney. Also, considering not many people were able to step up to the plate and donate, I think that this entire situation is just a LITTLE about ME!
Someone please tell me, why is that so bad anyway? I never asked for anything in return. Well that’s not entirely true, I did tell everyone I wanted the entire series of How I Met Your Mother so I could watch it from start to finish while I was laid up in bed recovering. But other than that, I donated knowing that my Godmother, someone I love more than anything, would be given a second chance and continue to be an integral part of my life and those around me. That’s it! Why must others try to complicate and pervert a situation that doesn’t need to be.
Now, lets discuss the advocacy part. Prior to our surgery I felt a sense of gratitude and a need to “pay it forward” because God blessed us and made the entire testing and surgery process completely seamless. I know God had a hand on the entire thing! I acknowledged from the very beginning that there were HUNDREDS OF THOUSANDS people out there that didn’t get the same blessing or luck or whatever and if I could do anything to spread awareness to get more living donors off their butts and tested and ultimately save lives; I was going to do it. And I have been! Maybe not the extent that I am satisfied with but I’m still trying to do my part. If even one person decides to donate an organ than I will have accomplished my goal.
Now in order to spread awareness I have to talk about it, DUH! That means me sharing not only our story but MY story and how I arrived at MY decision, how MY recovery was and really just MY perspective on it. Never do I intend to steal the spotlight or take away the significance from my recipient but I have to share my story in hopes of inspiring other donors. I can’t speak for my Godmother but I can speak for myself. I will say she has been super supportive! She even appeared on a news cast and although she was shaking with nerves she did it because she knows that we have a duty to pay it forward and create awareness for those not as blessed to have found a kidney match the way she did.
I can go on and on about this subject and honestly am a little pissed that I even have to address it. Fact is, creating awareness does NOT necessarily equal self promotion and for those that can’t see the difference… well I’ll just leave it at that.
Nothing makes me happier knowing that my Godmother gets celebrate another happy and healthy birthday. Her quality of life now is nothing short of a miracle and I am so thankful that we get to celebrate her birthday.
She is so sweet and this is the second year in a row that she has sent me flowers on her birthday. I am so thankful and blessed to have her in my life and give God all my praise for blessing her with another year of life!
I often say how life didn’t skip a beat after donating my kidney on May 23, 2012. The psychical symptoms of donating kidney have been none. Once I recovered post-op I was back to living my normal life. I can still remember that day as if it were yesterday. The night before the surgery my husband I took the kids to his parents where his mom would keep them over night and throughout the surgery day. Although most would feel scared leaving their kids knowing what the next day would bring I just kissed and hugged them a million times and was so eager for the next few days to pass so I could see them again. We had to be at Mayo at 5 am for check in and although I remember that morning I can’t really remember if I actually got sleep that night before. My guess is no!
The morning of May 23rd was exciting and I was grateful that as we pulled into The Mayo Clinic my parents and sister were right there with me. A few minutes later my Godmother was there to check in along with her mom and dad (my aunt and uncle who are like grandparents to me) and her sisters. We signed in and went upstairs to the surgery floor. This was actually happening!!
Moments Before the Kidney Transplant
That waiting room slowly filled up with more family and my kidney sister Amy and Kirti were there to show their support. We said a big group prayer and were taken to the pre-op room. Moments before being wheeled back to surgery my family came in to wish us one more good luck and say a quick prayer. I remember looking up at the ceiling on my short ride around the corner to the operation room. It was cold! Within seconds I was put under. In what felt like a blink of an eye I was waking up. My immediate thoughts were, thank you Lord!, how is my Godmother doing and I want to see my family! The nurse told me my Godmother was doing fine despite some complications she experienced but it was not related to my kidney. In my foggy state I didn’t know how to process that. All I wanted was to see my mommy and my husband. It felt like I laid in my recovery bed forever! They finally came in to see me and I felt safe again. They told me how proud they were of me and that they had heard my Godmother was doing fine. Mayo had a shortage of rooms so I was going to wait a little longer in recovery before going to my room. A few hours later my room was ready and prior to moving from the recovery room the nurse had a surprise for me. I was able to see my Godmother! Praise you Jesus for allowing us this moment. I will never forget it. I saw her in her recovery bed and she was awake and lively. In her foggy state she rambled something funny and I remember thinking how peculiar her thoughts were. Nonetheless, she sat before and MY kidney was WORKING in her! I knew the Lord had his hand on this surgery from the beginning. Now we were on our way to recovery…
Here I am with my kidney sister Amy the day after my surgery!
Even with all of Amy’s words of wisdom and advice recovery wasn’t anything like I had expected. With that being said, I was grateful to have had Amy’s insight because I was never scared. I just had never had major surgery before so it was uncharted territory. I had to figure it out as I went. I have two children and I am pretty sure donating a kidney was easier than natural childbirth! I would have gone home the next day but I had a minor fainting spell that was credited to my lack of food intake. While in the hospital I learned that my Godmother was peeing like a racehorse. My kidney was WORKING better than anyone could have expected! I was released from the hospital two days later and on my way to a weeks worth of TV.
I will forever be grateful to the doctors and nurses at The Mayo Clinic, my mom and sister who took care of me at home and my husband for taking care of the boys and being a single dad for over a week. Two weeks later I was working the bridal show! My Godmother has also had a smooth recovery.
Fast forward a year and I definitely thought our kidneyversary would have been a more joyous occasion but it wasn’t. May 23rd has a new memory and a new meaning. This day will be remembered for the passing of my grandfather who is also my Godmothers father. The ironic part is the year before he stood by our side and waited in the waited room for us to come out of surgery and a year later we stood by his bedside and watched him take his last breath. Although it wasn’t the way we had planned to celebrate at least my Godmother and I were together just as we have always been. I would do anything to have him back but I know I made him proud. Although he never told me how he felt about the kidney transplant I know he was thankful and was relieved that his daughter would have a second chance at life. May 23rd will now be a day of donation. He selflessly donated his brain for research. Our family has also experienced dementia and Alzheimer’s so he felt he needed to help. Almost to the exact hour a year before I donated my kidney and he donated his brain so come our next kidneyversary I hope someone can keep the tradition going…
He will forever be missed!
Simply a year ago we were preparing for our May 23rd kidney transplant. My Godmother was obviously too ill to do much of anything but we had said that come the 2013 Kidney walk with the National Kidney Foundation of Arizona we would be there to walk it!
I could not have been more proud to see the support of our family friends. We had gathered a team of 23 and everyone helped raise more than $1,200 for the foundation.
The best part was seeing other donors and recipients! My heart broke seeing the families of those walking in honor of someone who died of a kidney related disease. I was so happy and emotional to be able to walk along side my Godmother Patsy. I don’t think she knew what to expect with the walk but she was ultimately inspired and grateful.
It was fun running into Amy (Social Media Stole My Kidney) and Kirti, whose mom received Amy’s FABULOUS kidney. Catch up on their story here.
Amy and I during the kidney walk.
Kirti and I before the walk started
We are looking forward to next years walk. We plan to have a bigger team and raise double!
Every time I hear about someone who is suffering from some sort of kidney disease my heart gets so sad. Having experienced the effects of kidney disease on my Godmother and our family I wouldn’t wish it on anyone. However, after donating my kidney it seems that my sensor for the disease is higher and I am finding out just how common it is. It is one thing that so many people are currently living with kidney disease but it’s an entirely different thing that so many people are dying from it!
Any time someone discovers that I have donated my kidney I am always surprised by the plethora of questions that always follows. Some people ask if it hurt, about my scar, if I can still have kids, if I can drink alcohol, what happens if I need a kidney some day, and those are just some of the questions. The most common question I hear is, “But don’t you need BOTH your kidneys?” The answer is always NO (under my breath I mumble…obviously). Throughout this last year it has become so evident that people aren’t walking around simply refusing to donate a kidney or any organ for that matter they walk around with a lack of awareness and because of this so many people are dying an unnecessary death. THIS HAS TO STOP!
With a greater awareness of kidney disease and living kidney donation this could all be a thing of the past. Everyone needs to know how easy it is to donate an organ and when I say easy, I mean as easy as a surgery can be. To put it in perspective I was working a week and a half later and working a trade show two weeks after my surgery. Now I know I am a bit more crazy than the average person and I wouldn’t recommend that for everyone but the point is I was able to do it! My recovery was simple and most days I completely forget that I only have ONE kidney!
From the beginning of our kidney surgery journey I said we had to remember to always give back and help others traveling the same journey. We know that not everyone’s journey is as easy as ours was and because of that this blog exists along with all the other attempts I make to create awareness. A large focus of mine is to help a dear friend whom I’ve known since we were 13. Her name is Marissa and she is a military wife and mother to a new baby. What you can’t tell by looking at Marissa is that she is also a breast cancer survivor. After being diagnosed with cancer in her early 20’s she fought a hard battle and prevailed. Life was moving along quite nicely for Marissa. She met a great guy and had to be a patient wife while he was deployed. She gets pregnant and while it was a special time in her life she learned that her kidney function was at 17%. Due to her extremely low kidney function the baby had to be delivered a few months early. Baby RJ is extremely adorable and a fighter just like his mama. RJ has endured a few surgeries but is on his way to living a long and healthy life. All the while, Marissa is getting tested to get her on track for kidney donation. The hard part is finding a donor! That’s where I step in…
Marissa and her sweet family!
If everyone would educate themselves and really understand the disease and how they can play a part in helping saving someones life this really could be a thing of a past. Just think of how many children like baby RJ could have their parents live a long and healthy life with a working kidney that someone else didn’t even need. We all have two kidneys but only need one. Will you give yours!?!
The first day of any year always brings hope and excitement and this year is no exception. I woke up with a feeling of thankfulness and excitement for what 2013 will bring.
I woke up this morning and rushed to turn the tv on and watch the annual Rose Bowl Tournament of Roses Parade. This isn’t something I’d normally rush to do but this year I was eagerly awaiting the DONATE LIFE float. This float was just another beautiful reminder of what my family and myself experienced 7 months ago. Although, I’ve said that donating my kidney was one of the easiest decisions I’ve ever made and it was also easier than natural childbirth; I never mean to downplay the way it’s impacted my life. I just wish more people would consider donating so they can see how awesome it is to help save a life!
Watching the float drive by was bitter sweet. Sweet to see what it represented and sweet to know my Godmothers (my recipients) name and my name written on a float among thousands of other donors and recipients. However, it was bitter thinking of the many people who are waiting sometimes years to get the gift of life. As always, my desire is to share the success store/miracle/blessing that we experienced but more importantly to encourage others to do as I did and research becoming a donor. You could save a life!!
As we prepare to celebrate Thanksgiving tomorrow I can’t help but reflect on the journey this past year has brought my family and me. I know tomorrow as we gather around the festive dinner table we will naturally say grace and thank the Lord for all he has provided us with. We usually also go around the circle and state something we are thankful for. I imagine that we will all have a common thought and will share our thankfulness for the success of the kidney transplant and the new life that has resulted from the surgery.
It was around this time last year where my Godmother, Patsy was given the clearance to proceed with a kidney transplant and put on the “list”. I remember several times asking her for the details because I wanted to get tested and her response repeatedly was, “We’ll talk about it after the holidays.” That was her way of shrugging it under the rug and hoping I would lose the desire to get tested.
She should have known better! Anyone who knows me knows that if you tell me I can’t do something, I will do everything in my power to prove you wrong. Why would this be any exception?
I remember going through the holiday season and thinking that I would make the best of it because we had experienced too many “close calls” with her health and whether she was strong enough to make it to this year’s Thanksgiving was only known to God. I knew that as soon as I was able I would get tested and it wasn’t a matter of if I would be able to donate but whether WHEN I would donate.
As you all know by now, I was right (as usual) and we experienced a very successful kidney transplant. Not only is this week special because of Thanksgiving and all that it means but it is also our sixth month kidneyversary on Friday. Yes, that is correct… SIX months since my entire family endured such a physically and emotionally trying time.
So during tomorrow’s Thanksgiving prayer I know I will say an extra thank you to my Lord for giving me the desire and strength to have been able to donate but more importantly for healing my Godmother and allowing her new kidney to be accepted and heal her body. I also have to thank my immediate family for their help and understanding. My husband never once tried to talk me out of it (probably because he knew that would have been a lost cause) and for being there to calm and assure me throughout the process. I also am so thankful for the support I received from my parents and my sister. My mom and sister especially deserve my thanks for taking care of me and waiting on me hand and foot while I lay in my sister’s bed sleeping and watching every movie ever made. I also have to thank everyone who extended their prayers and support. I had such an outpouring of support from my family, friends, and even “strangers” that are no longer strangers from my social media world. The two most important people from my social media world are Amy aka The Fabulous One and Kirti. It was so inspiring and helpful to have their support since they had walked in my shoes. Amy made it all seem like a walk in the park and looking at where I am now I can say I agree with her. It was a walk in the park and much easier and not nearly as scary as most people would perceive.
So while we sit and reflect this Thanksgiving holiday I for one, have no doubt what I am thankful for. How blessed am I to say that this is only one of the many things I am thankful for this year. Thank you Lord!
Not a day goes by that I don’t thank God for the success of our kidney transplant. Today I give him thanks for his healing power and wish my Godmother, Patsy a very special and happy birthday!! I know we’ll spend many more birthdays together.
bigheartonekidney 